What’s it like being a daydreamer?

First of all, I’m not crazy, I know the difference between reality and fantasy. Still, I do get asked where my imagination comes from or how do I feel when I a vivid daydreams. Here’s a short explanation of a few things I go through:

 

1) I may be a daydreamer, but I do listen to what you’re telling me. I’m just picturing your situation in mind as you tell the story. Which is why I often get told by my friends, “I would’ve never thought of it that way! Thanks!”

 

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2) No, I do not ‘hear’ voices. I imagine my crush asking me out and things like that, but I know he didn’t just do so. Again, I’m aware when I’m daydreaming. Otherwise, I’d be at a mental facility.

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3) Concentration isn’t always easy, but it is possible to manage. It isn’t always easy to pay attention to things you’re not interested in (but things you must learn).  This is one of the reasons I walk a lot. I need to keep my mind balanced.

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4) It does help your memory. There are many things I remember that my friends don’t (how they made a fool of themselves this one time), and that’s because it replayed in my mind over and over, like a movie or story.

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5) Even though concentration is often a problem, with the right amount of silence it is easy to get into writing mode. The problem is getting out of it. It feels like the moment the movie ends at the theatre and you know the magic is over. It does get you down, I’m telling you.

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6) Comfort drinks and ice cream are my go-to buddies, when no one is available. My mind does get tired and drinks and ice cream get it going, when sleep is not an immediate option.

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7)  Daydreaming helps to deal with situations that might make you lose sleep over.

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8) It makes life interesting whenever you’re having a good or bad day. If I’m having an awesome day, the excitement gets so high I could hug a spider. However, on a gloomy day, I often picture myself buying a ticket to leave the planet and galaxy.  I think this applies to most people, but for a daydreamer, this is life. It is also easy to switch back and forth between daydreams.  Do not confuse this with mood swings, though.

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9) Writing can be a good escape and so is daydreaming. It gives you a bit of hope in life, if you don’t have someone to talk to at a specific moment.

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❤ ❤ ❤ Love, Ellie ❤ ❤ ❤

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Daily Prompt: Green-eyed Lady

They ask: We all get jealous from time to time — what wakes the green-eyed monster for you?

Daily Prompt: Green-eyed lady

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Oh, heck! I think I’ve just felt the wrath of the green-eyed monster. It is a foggy and rainy day and yes, I’m jealous of whatever city has warm and sunny weather :p. In all seriousness, I think us humans will always feel jealousy, there is no way to change it 100%; however, it is definitely possible to control it and lessen the reasons why we become jealous. When I was younger —a long time ago. I’m 26 now — most of my classmates had plastic multifunction pencil cases, which were extremely popular then. I wanted one. How could I not have one and my friends could, right? I was determined to get it and tried to convince my mum to get me one. My mum, being the good parent that she is, explained how the pencil cases were not very convenient due to lack of space, but I didn’t want to listen. During our trip to purchase school supplies for the next school year, my mum found the multifunction pencil case, and before we purchased anything, she showed me the one she recommended (bigger and practical) and the one I wanted. Are you sure you prefer the plastic one? She asked, hoping to convince me not to get it. Yes! Please! Please! She asked me a few more times, but failed to change my mind. Well, she ended up buying it. You’d think that she was spoiling me, that she bought it to shut me up (I was a chatterbox so I wouldn’t blame her), but she was on a quest to teach me a lesson (I was old enough for it).

When we got home I opened it, but I didn’t transfer my supplies from my old pencil case. Instead, I wanted to flaunt it at school. I didn’t want to brag, I just wanted to let everyone know I had one, I was cool like them. Sure enough, my classmates loved my new pencil case and before class started, I decided to fill it with my pencils and erasers. You should have seen me, proudly grinning at the fact I got what everyone had. Then, it faded. Wait, how come nothing fits in here, I thought. I’ll make them fit. I know what I’m doing. How come nothing fits in this THING. Ugh.

At the end of the school day, my mum picked me up, and I exited the school doing the walk of shame. How was your day? She knew something happened by the look of my face. Ok, but the pencil case didn’t work. Can we exchange it for another one? I whispered. Same one? She asked. No, the one you showed me. She told me there was a chance they wouldn’t do the exchange, after all I really wanted the plastic pencil case. But, we returned to the store and my mum asked me to do the talking. Yea, hmm, I..I..want to exchange this? I asked. Want? Mum stared. May I exchange this? I asked again. Luckily, they let me do the exchange. As soon as I got home, I transferred all of my supplies to the new pencil case, and I was happy. My mum told me that there are times we want to do what other people do or what they have, but I shouldn’t strive to obtain things because I want them and to follow others. In addition, I should find what works for me and what I like. Sure, I liked the pencil case, but only because my peers had it, and it was not useful in any way. But, she reminded me that we all live differently and should be grateful for what I currently have. Also that we don’t know what life has given other people, and we don’t know why they have certain things or why they lack. She mentioned kids who don’t even get a chance to go to school,or even have the supplies to help them.

That does not mean I suddenly stopped being jealous and lived in everlasting perfection, but it stuck with me and I did learn a valuable lesson out of a pencil case situation. I don’t remember if it was that year or the years after, but during one Christmas I received two of the same toy, and I clearly remember as soon as I received them, I told my parents I wanted to donate one of them. A few days later, we paid a visit to some children and I gave them the toy. I helped them assemble it and they looked very happy. It felt so good to give back and I haven’t forgotten it to this day.

Of course, I still get jealous of certain things, I’m not perfect and I don’t expect to be. However, I have learned to control certain aspects of jealousy and whenever I get jealous, I tell myself the Blessings I have in my life at that very moment. Yes, it is hard, because you also look into the past and wonder what could’ve happened or what you could’ve had, but we must remember that those thoughts damage your soul. Everyone is different, and we must find the key that helps up bring ourselves back to our reality. As much as that reality may be grey, we still have a light inside all of us. Instead of looking backwards, look forward to the next day in your life, not in others’.

 

❤ ❤ ❤ Love, Ellie ❤ ❤ ❤

 

 

Poem: Emotional Distress

On the edge of a precipice

I hold on to the most precious

struggling to bind the pieces

it is exhausting

it is emotionally tiring.

For how long can I hold on

will I ever regain hope?

~

I cling onto the edge 

watching the rocks of my emotional state 

fall down the cliff

splashing in the water

failing miserably to lift me up

~

As the rocks fall, my pockets fill with distress

it’s time to let go they say

I can’t

I still am hopeful 

but don’t be, maybe it won’t get better

I’m not strong

I’m meant to fail.

~

Awake I face reality

Asleep I chase my dreams

But you can make a switch

there is hope

no there is not

I can’t put together my broken pieces anymore.

~

it’s a sonet of painful tones

an emotional mountain of despair

on my shoulders

and for what?

for hope, you say

my flask has almost none.

~

It’s not over

the amount is not significant

it can flourish and you can regain yourself

try, for yourself. 

~

Confront your reality

battle the sorrows

chase your dreams

win back your life

amend your heart

believe again.

Writer in a bottle

I’ve been inured to writing for a while now. It’s basically my twin, and I have some sort of relationship with it. We’re like an old married couple, honestly. If I don’t find the right words, it goes on the couch (metaphorically speaking). A witness to this fictional matrimony is Enya, the most wonderful singer in the entire universe. She has joined our fellowship (Lord of the Rings reference), and has made it very difficult to write without her gracious music playing in the background. “What? You don’t listen to rap songs? Hip hop, yo?” That’s right, I don’t. If you do, I’m cool with it, I have nothing against you, but how is “Shake yo thang you dirty b****” is going to inspire me? You’ve read my blog (hopefully), so unless I’m banging a spider, I don’t think I’d find any of those songs useful.

Adrenaline engulfs my spirit when I write. It honestly feels like I’m living my life inside a bottle, and it’s only when I write, when I’m released into the world. It’s a good bottle, though. But, you know what I mean. It’s a different world. It’s an abiding reward that doesn’t always disappoint. While it doesn’t give me magical powers (unless I write about it), it does grant me the wish to share my thoughts with the world. Forget three wishes, with me and my writing, you get infinite ones.

In many ways, I do not feel trapped in a bottle. I feel it is merely a chance to live your life and to escape to where you want to go, while still doing good to others. I like to think of it as being a pianist. I don’t play the piano, but when I see those who do, you can tell they’re being transported into another realm. They let their souls and fingers take them where they feel they must go at that moment. In my case, my piano is my keyboard.

Allow yourself a time to escape your world. But do not feel guilty, or feel you might be ungrateful, because you want to escape your bottle. It’s simply a different route you can take, while still finding a way back. What you do inside your bottle will reflect on what you do outside of it. You’re still the same person, but you’re giving yourself a different adventure. It’s okay.

Image^^^This is not a picture of a bottle, but of my former hamster (RIP) leaving his ‘bottle’. See, even hamsters let themselves loose once in a while :). I know, it’s for food, but hey, it’s their world!

Of course! The world doesn’t rule me today :D!

 

 

 

© Ellie and My name is Ellie and this is who I am, 2014. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to  Ellie and My name is Ellie and this is who I am, with appropriate and specific direction to the original content. In addition, ‘Shares’ on social media may be used, providing full and clear link/credit is added.

Desertion of Reality

There are many ways I choose to escape from reality, as well as many reasons. My constant desire to detach from the norm doesn’t mean I don’t want to be part of this life. It’s just a different route I can take and if I choose, I can merge it with my reality.

Most of the times, my preference in movies and music do not coincide with others’. But, I guess that is kind of the point of escaping reality (unless I want to escape with someone). I can drink peppermint tea and watch an Audrey Hepburn movie, and be happy for the rest of the day. I can simply write while listening to Enya, suffer withdrawal as soon as I stop listening to her songs, and still be happy (I can always turn the music on again :p).

One of my favourite things to do is take photos, and pretend they’re a different world. It’s nice to dream about different places, where you can experience lots of adventures. It makes life more interesting.

I’ll share this photo I took a while ago. I decided to cut most of the house, and take a picture of the trees and the sun. There is something that enlightens my surroundings, when I imagine I’m somewhere else. It’s nice to take a moment to appreciate the good that is left in this world.

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I’m not saying I’m a happy little bunny all the time, not capable of sadness. I just like to make my own happiness sometimes :).

Of course! The world doesn’t rule me today 🙂 

 

 

 

© Ellie and My name is Ellie and this is who I am, 2014. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to  Ellie and My name is Ellie and this is who I am, with appropriate and specific direction to the original content. In addition, ‘Shares’ on social media may be used, providing full and clear link/credit is added.