I have shared the first page of my novel with a few friends and family and have received positive feedback. The common question is, “How did you come up with all this? How did you think of the names?” The answer is, daydreams and dreams have become my unpaid internship. I intentionally daydream and dream my entire novel, in order to put realism in it. I’m basically creating the entire world and scenarios in my head, as I go on with my daily life. I can lucid dream, and this allows me to continue working on it while I’m sleep. I don’t know how I do it, but thank goodness I can.
I came up with the name for my main character while I was in the bathroom. It was definitely not my intention to do so, but ideas just come and go, and the name was so good I didn’t want to flush it down the toilet (pun totally intended). I’m not proofreading at the moment, because it is wasting too much time, and I want to make sure I have the story written down. There are a few holes I need to patch, but I have learned not to worry about the final details, in case the plot changes along the way. I have learned to control my daydreaming, because if I want to pay the bills right now, I need to be able to work with society. I used to zone out a lot, but now I only do when I allow myself to do so. It isn’t easy, because my novel is part of my life and it is hard to stop the ideas flowing in, but I’m managing. I have to admit, there are days where it kills me inside when I don’t pay attention to my writing voice, or when I cannot daydream, and it does cause me stress, but I use my days off to let the dreams escape and the words come to fruition on paper (or Word document). It doesn’t make it 100% better, but I have learned to accept it and to be grateful for what I have.
I believe to a certain extent that my daydreaming is a symptom of me being an Empath (read this website) and that’s why I live to dream and shut down if something won’t let me do it. The reason I’m writing this post is because I have discovered this recently (specifically, yesterday). Events in my life finally make sense, dots have been connected. Some people thought I was crazy when I predicted deaths in my family, or when I knew how they felt before they told me what was happening. It is not scientifically proven, but I can tell you all the traits you read on that website are mostly true for me (the meat and antique ones do not apply to me entirely nor depression). But, this probably explains why I don’t do well in crowds and why I don’t like strangers rubbing off on me when they pass by. If I have to be in a crowd, for example when I go out with friends, then I do it without complaining. It doesn’t mean I cry and scream if I’m around too many people, but I get tired by the end of the day. I don’t know where I can go from here, but whether I’m an Empath or not, at least now I know I’m not the only one with those traits :).
Robert Downey Jr. approves of me!
❤ ❤ ❤ Love, Ellie ❤ ❤ ❤