Poem: One End

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Living with a pierced heart

we still have untold stories

as strong as I can be

loss becomes one’s shadow.

~~~

We shared our worlds

I shed the tears

I looked at your back

I forgot who you were.

~~~

You didn’t mean to

You came back and I smiled

but hope faded

there was one end, hurt.

We’re still the same

We’re not one.

~~~

Resentment numbed 

but it was noticed

I woke up, I stood up

I kept going 

there is no end,

I’ll be understood again.

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Poem – Jumbled Soul

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Jumbled Soul

When wrapped in screaming thorns

where the light is blocked by solitude 

trials with abundant errors

without the will of recouping hope

~~~

The enervate emotion of a jumbled soul

perpetuates its most splendid wishes

to dangle from its potential fulfilment

and falsely misinform its heart and mind

~~~

Without the effort to console its true destiny

it dissipates from its surroundings

eluding its self-worth 

and endangering its serendipity 

~~~

It must pause and rely on instinct

and cautiously proceed onto the next path

embracing its perspective

as to attain its safest pace

~~~

 

 

 

 

Luxury – A to Z challenge

A to Z challenge letter: L

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Luxury

Luxury to me is not about materialism, but about the jewels of the heart. Even though, I have experienced many heartbreaks. I still hold on to my good memories and I am happy to say I do live a luxurious life. thanks to my upbringing. I did not find out what I’m about to share with you, until I was older. My grandpa was diagnosed with cancer when I was little and the doctors only gave him a 2% (if I remember the number correctly) chance of survival. Back then, my family owned a few properties, meaning we were financial stable. not rich I may add. My mum and grandma had a choice to make, which took them less than a second to agree on a decision; they were going to sell it all and fight the cancer battle alongside my grandpa. Sure enough, he made a miraculous recovery and went on to live a fruitful life. Had they chose not to selfless give up their material possessions, I would not have had the chance to get to know the wonderful man my grandpa was. He was a father figure to me and for that I am extremely grateful. I often wonder how I would’ve turned out had he not lived so long. Would I have been spoiled? Well, not that I wasn’t, after all grandparents will always be grandparents, it is their duty to spoil their grandchildren :p. But, would my soul be capable of being so thankful today? I don’t know how the death of my grandpa would’ve affected us then. My mum had a very Faithful upbringing, so I don’t think I would’ve turned out bad, but I do wonder sometimes. Their love for my grandpa and the selfness to come to his aid when they needed him most, are the acts of love in my life that have left a luxurious impact in my heart. They loved him, they saved him, they saved me. Sadly, my grandpa passed away last year, on May 27th, after losing a battle with cancer. He was 85. But he fulfilled his destiny and left an amazing legacy for me to continue.

Luxury isn’t always material possessions, but memories preserved as jewels in your heart.

<3<3<3 Love, Ellie <3<3<3

Home – A to Z Challenge

A to Z Challenge letter for today: H

 

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Home

What is home? Baby don’t hurt me, don’t hurt me, no …wait, wrong song! But, yes I do want to talk about this. What is home? It is hard to see during hardships, but it is always there and we often find our way after we drift away. The beauty of this question is that there is no correct and definitive answer, because we all have different views on what home means to us. It doesn’t necessarily mean that home is one thing during a specific time and place, it is whatever we want it to be. I love tea, and after a long day at work home is sitting in front of my laptop, drinking tea, and catching up with everything. Other days, however, I find my home inside the bed sheets while I watch my favourite movies, or I feel comfort just munching on popcorn while I watch Charmed. How about Photography? Of course, that can be home, as well. Painting my nails, doing my hair, talking on the phone, writing on here, my home is universal.

When we feel down, we seek to do the things that cheer us up, and that is home. There are no boundaries to what makes us feel at home, and no one can take it away from us, nor should we let anyone do so. All of us here have something in common, we call WordPress our home; we feel at home because we love to write and inspire. Let yourself be lost in your own serenity and always appreciate the fact you have a home, literally everywhere. Home is where you feel safe, where you feel comfort, and where you forget your troubles. Always remember not to choose the path of self-destruction, because once you get lost in it, it will be hard (never impossible) to find your way back home.

❤ ❤ ❤ Love, Ellie ❤ ❤ ❤

Poetry: Watering Flowers

If I’m watering flowers

I ignore your place

I hesitate and deny my hearing

I cannot face my worst fear.

 ~~~

When our stares meet

our flawed desires vanish

our souls are in peril

I loathe the emotions

do not smear your darkness.

~~~

The birds sing misery

I feel the strong currents

the petals drop on my feet

I do not look back.

~~~

Stop looking, they sing

it will not return

my sentiments are drained

why is it lost?

~~~

Wailing lament

floating with grief

waiting to sink

waiting to crash

waiting to be whole again.

 

 

Poetry: Undying

Scribbling pain on my stitched up heart

I feel, I ache,

I beg for a cure for this torment.

Ripping memories through dark jungles,

I stride through hopes and muddy comforts.

~~~

I seek selfish help and broken words;

I regret,

I hope for better consolation,

through strikes of lightning

in my superstorm.

~~~

Unscrambled dreams possess

untimely divine is lost,

chased by unlawful creatures

attracted by the scent of my confined soul.

~~~

Sparked such fear, 

good dreams are scarce

send forth my madness

into my forte of hopes.

~~~

Sprinkle my heart with your healing loving,

and run with me down streaming waters

catch my wings and teach me to fly

help me be born again.

~~~

Poem: Emotional Distress

On the edge of a precipice

I hold on to the most precious

struggling to bind the pieces

it is exhausting

it is emotionally tiring.

For how long can I hold on

will I ever regain hope?

~

I cling onto the edge 

watching the rocks of my emotional state 

fall down the cliff

splashing in the water

failing miserably to lift me up

~

As the rocks fall, my pockets fill with distress

it’s time to let go they say

I can’t

I still am hopeful 

but don’t be, maybe it won’t get better

I’m not strong

I’m meant to fail.

~

Awake I face reality

Asleep I chase my dreams

But you can make a switch

there is hope

no there is not

I can’t put together my broken pieces anymore.

~

it’s a sonet of painful tones

an emotional mountain of despair

on my shoulders

and for what?

for hope, you say

my flask has almost none.

~

It’s not over

the amount is not significant

it can flourish and you can regain yourself

try, for yourself. 

~

Confront your reality

battle the sorrows

chase your dreams

win back your life

amend your heart

believe again.

Shadows

A reign of denial

melting your soul

in incandescent fire

destroying your thoughts

by infinite Shadows.

~

Logic and purpose questioned

covered in a bandage of despair and regret

breathless and paralysed

falling into an abyss of Shadows.

~

Songs of sorrow shatter hopes

cementing its vile without warning

through shameless lament

sent from the Shadows.

~

Away they must go

alone I feel the need to be

stop crashing onto me

let them take me, these Shadows.

~

Tears down your cheeks

why are you not listening

will they help me

what if they take them?

these are Shadows.

~

If reaching your hand will vanish them

why am I reluctant?

You can’t transform me

these are powerful Shadows.

If I must trust, I could try

but you must pull me fast

from the Shadows.

~

It is safe, but why are you covering my eyes?

I promise, I will not look back.

 your hand has vanquished,

the Shadows.

~

You have conquered,

me?

We have conquered,

the Shadows.

9

Of course! The world doesn’t rule me today

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