What I have learned in the month of July

I decided that July was going to be a month dedicated to myself. I wasn’t selfish, but I just needed time to focus on who I am. These are some of the things I’ve learned:

1) I have a connection with Poetry. I’ve written poems since I was little, but last month made me realize that I would love to introduce myself to the publishing world through them. So, as I mentioned before, I’m going to submit poems to writing magazines. Wish me luck!

2) I need to buy a new pair of runners. I walk a lot and I love it, but that also means I go through runners a little more often than I would want. I’ve done the whole investing into a good pair, but they still get worn out, so no more (my wallet thanks me for this).

3) Robert Downey Jr is having a baby girl, which crushes any hopes of me marrying him (you know, because before I totally had a chance). Still, I’m happy for him and his wife 😀

4) Drivers on a rush annoy me. If you’re on a rush, then next time get up early. But, I hate it when it’s my turn to cross and the guy is too eager to turn around the curve that I feel s/he is about to run me over. Just wait a few seconds, it’s better than spending the rest of your life rotting in jail.

5) I still love Netflix. I’m currently watching The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air!

6) Going to the library pays off. If you have a library card, you can get access to Hoopla, which is kind of like a discount Netflix. It’s free and you can find movies to borrow online! You get 10 titles per month. I love it, because I can watch Audrey Hepburn movies :). Here’s the link: https://www.hoopladigital.com/

7) I watched The Diary of Anne Frank after many years, and I have found a new hero. She was so positive in the middle of a dark time.

8) I added a new snowglobe to my collection. I love snowglobes and music boxes. When I was little I used to open my heart-shaped music box whenever I felt sad. My grandma used to have one, too. I guess they’re sentimental values to me.

9) My birthday is approaching and it’s a bit bittersweet for me. It was on my 20th birthday when I last spoke to my grandma; she had a stroke two days later. It’s been almost 7 years and it still feels like yesterday. My birthday is on August 30th, and I’m turning 27.

10) Only 40 days until my trip to South America :), which means I’ll be posting A LOT.

11) I need to get a new planner. I use my ipod to make notes, but sometimes technology is not on my side, so from now on, I would like to organize my activities on solid paper.

12) I love Rose and Red wine. I’m not a drinker, but I do like to indulge in a glass of wine once in a while. Funny enough, Rose has more effect on me than Red. Weird, eh?

I suggest dedicating a month to yourself, it really helps. Most of my life, I’ve done things for others, but I don’t always focus on myself. It doesn’t mean you have to be selfish, it just means you should focus on doing more things for yourself. Perhaps, treat yourself to a spa day, or finishing your novel, etc. I haven’t touched mine during this month, but I’m going back to working on it.

Remember, you have to be happy with yourself before you can help others to be happy.

 

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❤ ❤ ❤ Love, Ellie ❤ ❤ ❤

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This is who I am. Is that so hard to accept?

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I don’t kill, I don’t hurt others, I may not like being in crowds, but that doesn’t mean I don’t love people. I love animals, I love to walk, I love to dream, I love to write, I love to read, I love to stay still. I’m not a doctor, I’m not a CEO, I’m not a lawyer, I’m not an Engineer. I’m an artist, and that’s who I am. Is that so hard to accept? 

“You should be a CEO. You should be a lawyer. You should be a private investigator.”

“You should be,” is what I’ve heard so many times. But, how about who I want to be? Why can’t some people accept who I really am? If I’m not self-destructing or hurting others, if what I do makes me happy, why can’t they accept it? I’m not going to succumb to peer pressure and follow what others think I should do. I never have and I don’t plan to do it any time for the rest of my life. I’m going to follow my dreams and leave the legacy I was born to pass on. Money isn’t everything. Money isn’t going to buy me immortality, but my dreams are going to grant me everlasting happiness. Whenever my time comes, I want to close my eyes and smile knowing I achieved my happiness and inspired others. 

I have two choices, let others rule my life and become the woman I shouldn’t be, or realize my dreams and become the woman I was born to be. I choose the latter.

 

❤ ❤ ❤ Love, Ellie ❤ ❤ ❤

Daydreaming is my unpaid internship

I have shared the first page of my novel with a few friends and family and have received positive feedback. The common question is, “How did you come up with all this? How did you think of the names?” The answer is, daydreams and dreams have become my unpaid internship. I intentionally daydream and dream my entire novel, in order to put realism in it. I’m basically creating the entire world and scenarios in my head, as I go on with my daily life. I can lucid dream, and this allows me to continue working on it while I’m sleep. I don’t know how I do it, but thank goodness I can.

I came up with the name for my main character while I was in the bathroom. It was definitely not my intention to do so, but ideas just come and go, and the name was so good I didn’t want to flush it down the toilet (pun totally intended). I’m not proofreading at the moment, because it is wasting too much time, and I want to make sure I have the story written down. There are a few holes I need to patch, but I have learned not to worry about the final details, in case the plot changes along the way. I have learned to control my daydreaming, because if I want to pay the bills right now, I need to be able to work with society. I used to zone out a lot, but now I only do when I allow myself to do so. It isn’t easy, because my novel is part of my life and it is hard to stop the ideas flowing in, but I’m managing. I have to admit, there are days where it kills me inside when I don’t pay attention to my writing voice, or when I cannot daydream, and it does cause me stress, but I use my days off to let the dreams escape and the words come to fruition on paper (or Word document). It doesn’t make it 100% better, but I have learned to accept it and to be grateful for what I have.

I believe to a certain extent that my daydreaming is a symptom of me being an Empath (read this website) and that’s why I live to dream and shut down if something won’t let me do it. The reason I’m writing this post is because I have discovered this recently (specifically, yesterday). Events in my life finally make sense, dots have been connected. Some people thought I was crazy when I predicted deaths in my family, or when I knew how they felt before they told me what was happening. It is not scientifically proven, but I can tell you all the traits you read on that website are mostly true for me (the meat and antique ones do not apply to me entirely nor depression). But, this probably explains why I don’t do well in crowds and why I don’t like strangers rubbing off on me when they pass by. If I have to be in a crowd, for example when I go out with friends, then I do it without complaining. It doesn’t mean I cry and scream if I’m around too many people, but I get tired by the end of the day. I don’t know where I can go from here, but whether I’m an Empath or not, at least now I know I’m not the only one with those traits :).

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Robert Downey Jr. approves of me!

❤ ❤ ❤ Love, Ellie ❤ ❤ ❤

 

A to Z challenge reflections

This A to Z challenge has been a great way to share my thoughts and try to motivate others. My theme was to write a life lesson for each post. Hopefully, I was able to inspire other bloggers out there :). The only thing I didn’t like was that I couldn’t ‘follow’ other bloggers, because their blog was on blogspot, and I don’t have an account there. Other than that, I really don’t have anything negative to say. Yes, it was a challenge, and sometimes I didn’t know what I was going to try about. It was a great thrill and I hope to join other challenges in the future :). Here’s a list of all my entries for you to read if you haven’t already. Go through it, share it, cry, eat ice cream, dance, do whatever you want :p. Thank you to everyone who reads and likes what I write and I encourage each and every one of you to never lose your voice.

 

A – A quitter: I’m quitting writing

B- Because animals are hilarious creatures

C- Countless Power

D- Defying Designs

E-Emotions

F- Friendships

G-Growing

H-Home

I-Inspirational

J-Joy

K-Kissing Kite

L-Luxury

M- Mother Nature

N-Night

O-Obscure Mentality

P-Project

Q-Quaker

R-Regret

S-Stench

T-Tired T-Rex

U-Undo

V-Villain

W-Wisdom

X-Xhaustion

Y-You Are

Z-Zone

❤ ❤ ❤ Love, Ellie ❤ ❤ ❤

Your fountain of youth

It happens instantly, when your agonizing muscles will not give in to your vigorous routine. You drop the towel, grab a drink, stand still or sit down. That’s when you are quick to disparage your efforts toward your healthy goal.

It’s easy to give in when you just finished abdominal crunches, and pose on the floor like you just broke all the bones in your body (because, in your mind, a simple crunch will ruin your life). So, after 10 crunches, you convince yourself you just burned away 10 pounds, and therefore, will not need to work out for the next week. I get it, your muscles are sore, your mind is tired, your heart is pounding.

Then, the next day, you choose to give it another try, but this time you push it a bit. You actually complete one of those seven-minute workouts. Sure, you want to rip your hair and glue it back together (to give yourself more stress and something to rant about), but then realize, why is a seven-minute workout feel so damaging? You must be really out of shape. And you are, but so is your spirit.

Nobody said it was going to be easy, but you can mentally make it so. Seven minutes a day is not as bad as it may sound. After the first workouts, it will feel like someone punched you with a mace, but the next day, it will feel rewarding. After a week, you will do things you were not able to do before. Your mind will conquer, and you will believe it could be possible after all.

Take it at your own pace, because only you and your body will react positively to what it feels right. Change it up a bit, go for a walk, increase the challenge each day. it really does work. Find something that inspires you to strive for your goals. Make your goals realistic and you will not despair. Treat yourself, so you have something to look forward to.

It is just like when you write, you won’t quit, because it is your passion. So, do not underestimate a good workout, give it a chance to become your passion. Don’t stop moving. You’ll find your own fountain of youth.

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^^^Fountain of youth (not a real one)

Of course! The world doesn’t rule me today (only when my muscles are tired from working out)

 

 

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