Calm Nostalgia

Stressful and tiring days are inevitable. How do you disconnect from your routine? Do you sit in silence, or do you blast music and dance like a maniac?

My calm comes with nostalgia, because what makes me feel better also reminds me of what isn’t here anymore. I lay on my bed and slowly run my fingers through my hair. I turn the lights off and drift away in memory to my grandparents’ place. I used to be the first one up and would stare into the ceiling during sunrise, until I felt the need to check on my grandparents and sister.

When I was a kid, life seemed so simple; school, homework, have fun. But now, it’s all about the future. Problems that once felt minuscule, are now chaos that sometimes spiral out of control. And why must I worry? I’m not immortal. I think I worry because one day I’ll have kids, and I want to provide them with the same sense of simplicity. Will that happen? I don’t know, but I can live my life and find out later.

I am grateful for the nostalgic memories, because it is a reminder of something good in my life. If they weren’t good, why would I miss them, right?

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❤ ❤ ❤ Love, Ellie ❤ ❤ ❤

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Have you ever experienced Sleep Paralysis?

According to wikipedia: Sleep paralysis is a phenomenon in which people, either when falling asleep or wakening, temporarily experience an inability to move.

If you have ever experienced sleep paralysis, you know it feels like a force trying to pull you to the depths of hell. Everyone goes through different emotions and feelings, but here are a few things that you may have experienced before. If you have never experience this, consider yourself lucky :).

 

-The feeling is basically like this: you fall asleep and it feels like within a second you’re awake again. However, there is a plot twist: you may be awake, but your body is numb. Yes, you’re frozen, except you don’t feel cold (nor hot).

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-I’ve gotten better at sleeping with the lights off, but a while ago I had to have some sort of light source. When you are under sleep paralysis and your lights are off, you feel like you just died (no joke). If you have your lights on, at least you know you’re alive, because you see something that’s familiar. It makes a difference to your sanity.

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-Now that you are aware you are under a paralysis, it just gets worse. The dreadful feeling of being hunted by a demonic beast begins to cover every inch of your body, making your heart palpitate and begging the angels to stop the fear. Oh, and did I mention you can’t move at all? Oh yes, I did. No matter how hard you try to move, it feels like your soul has left your body and no matter how hard you try to touch something, you can’t.

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-All you have left is your will to survive, but now that’s starting to fade away as you begin to hallucinate. Oh no, we’re not talking about fairies, unicorns, or leprechauns saving the day, we’re talking shadows, ghosts, evil laughter, you name it. It’s like one of those dreams where you run, but you can’t get away from whoever is chasing you…

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-…because when you’re under sleep paralysis, the evil beings DO catch up to you. Sometimes, you’ll feel someone tickling or clawing you. Again, you can’t do anything but scream in your mind. It feels as though all your bad karma is sitting on your chest trying to kill you. You feel like you’re not breathing, but you really are, it just feels that way.

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-Solution? What I found works for me is as soon as I’m aware of what’s going on, I just try to relax as much as possible. You don’t know when it’s over until you fall asleep and wake up again, but it really doesn’t last as long you think it does. Like I said, it’s different for everyone. Sometimes you’ll hallucinate and see a shadow standing by your door creeping at you (scary stuff), sometimes you’ll feel violated by some dark being, or you’ll just stay still trying to touch things around you. It also helps if you’re stress-free before bedtime.

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❤ ❤ ❤ Love, Ellie ❤ ❤ ❤

Random Photo of the Day #3…with a Story Starter!

=plays game show tune= 

Welcome to today’s random photo of the day! Everyone is a winner, and all you have to do is sit back, read, and enjoy. We have 4 doors for you today. There is not catch, you can pick all 4 doors if you want, they each have something different in it. The only thing you have to do is choose which one you want to see. Scroll down!

Door One

This photo was taken in Belcarra, BC.

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Door Two

It is a beautiful and relaxing place. The spot I took it at is a great place for reflection and photo taking.

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Door Three

Here it is!

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Door Four

Story Starter: Its calm waters helped her identify the empathy within her soul…

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Of course! The world doesn’t rule me today!

© Ellie and My name is Ellie and this is who I am, 2014. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to  Ellie and My name is Ellie and this is who I am, with appropriate and specific direction to the original content. In addition, ‘Shares’ on social media may be used, providing full and clear link/credit is added.