New Blog!

Hi everyone. I created another blog where I will talk about my daily life, separate from my writing. I will still post more poems and other writings here, so I’m not going anywhere, but go check it out and follow me (i’ll follow back).

takeitfrommyexperience.wordpress.com

You can still follow me on instagram: worldruler007

 

❤ ❤ ❤ Love Ellie ❤ ❤ ❤

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My mind, the land of ruckus

Sometimes I look up at the stars and imagine living in world outside our planet. The galactic imagery is suddenly crashed by the ups and down of my life; also known as, being hit by reality. Is it because I have the mind of a writer that I think my life evolves as the like of stories? It gets overwhelming and it’s worse when you have people constantly putting you down. You get one chance at life, just one life and if you’re lucky you live up to 100. What legacy am I going to leave? Why can’t some people believe in me and influence me in a positive manner? Why does it affect me? Does this happen to you?

prc

 

❤ ❤ ❤ Love, Ellie ❤ ❤ ❤

 

It’s been a while…

…a long time since we have last spoken. Well, since you last read any new entries. A lot has happened since last summer; heartbreaks, chapters that have been since closed. I have been preocuppied with work and finishing my novel and poetry book – yes those are still a reality. I told you I would never give up :D! Here’s to say I’m sorry for not updating in a while and I hope you’re looking forward to my new entries. In the meantime, here are some new photos I’ve taken and also follow me on my instagram and comment :D! My instagram: worldruler007

 

Unknown Squirrel

There he was (or she? Let’s just go with ‘he’), carefully stepping on the fresh coat of snow. The only creature to give signs of life in the never-ending winter. Mr. Squirrel prepared for his journey, across the street. Did he forget where he kept his nuts? Was this a sign that spring was nearby? What was he doing? Why was he there? To cheer me up, I bet. I said it, I’m partial to squirrels.

I glanced through the window on a sunny but extremely cold day – with frost on the frames – and eager to see this creature enjoy his life. He appeared out of nowhere and it caught my attention. He was brown and looked healthy – normal weight for a squirrel I suppose, but I’m not a veterinarian – and I tried to figure out what he was doing. He stopped when he heard cars coming, and he moved a step or two towards the snow cliff in the yard. It was a great moment for a photo, but I didn’t want to disturb him. He was on a mission.

He didn’t get any food from the snow. He stood on the cliff until the cars went by. Suddenly, he made a run for it; he tried to cross the street. “Good luck, little buddy!” I shouted in my mind. I hesitated to go outside and witness first-hand his victory. I almost did, but then he stopped on the edge of the sidewalk. The cars drove by and he went back to the bottom of the cliff in the yard. And then, he ran until his heart raised to maximum (or so it seemed).

A lot of cars drove by and I lost sight of him, but then he triumphantly ran up the snow cliff across the tree, and went up the tree he must have longed for. He made it, and I was happy.

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There is no Valentine’s Day on Mars

If you’ve ever wanted to leave the planet, no matter what, then join my just-made-up club. I have nothing against people celebrating love, birthdays, achievements, randomness. What I am against is people following trends, making others feel obliged to spend money on junk, therefore losing meaning of what lies underneath its original purpose.

Oh, but here’s the plot twist. The original intend of Valentine’s day was filled with a Pagan tradition, involving slapping women with the remains of dead animals, in order to bestow fertility upon them. How romantic!  And while we certainly do not follow such traditions (thank goodness), we still support the desire of making ourselves feel better by following trends we would’ve never followed, and thus unknowingly partake in a tradition that when you read about it, makes you feel nauseated  . Here’s a hint: 50 Shades (shames) of Grey.

Are you aware of what you are supporting, ladies and gentlemen? Society reminds us of evolving, of becoming more accepting without the use of violence. How on earth are we supposed to do this, if there is such hypocrisy in society?

Now, nobody really knows for sure when all this Valentine’s Day phenomenon started. But, they say it could’ve also started with Saint Valentine, who was a priest who performed weddings behind the Emperor’s back. He was caught, arrested, and sentenced to death. History tells us, the newly-weds would send gifts to his cell and before he was to be executed, he sent one of them a letter signed by, “Your Valentine.” Then, a tradition was born. And in today’s society, that tradition is DEAD. Absolutely, DEAD. If there is anything more than DEAD…you get my point. Okay, I did exaggerate, because not everyone has managed to bludgeon the real meaning of this tradition. It is not just about love, but it is about gratitude, understanding, and sacrifice.

It is a sad world we live in, when you see people getting all worked up about not finding the perfect gift. How about YOU being the perfect gift? How about your loved one being the perfect gift? Or your HEALTHY LIFE being a gift? If you feel the need to go out to the store before they close just find a last minute card for your significant other, then something isn’t going the right way.

So, what if you don’t get a card along with the flowers. Is your loved one going to kill you? Can’t you just make everyday of your lives, about love? Isn’t that the point of a relationship AND friendship? Is it that important to find a $5,000 ring to propose? You’re PROPOSING, you’re being PROPOSED to. Isn’t that a gift? Isn’t that love?

Yes, celebrate Valentine’s Day, celebrate everyday, but without forgetting your layers in your relationships and friendships. Because, the moment you start loving someone (romantic or not), you sacrifice your selfishness, and THAT is a gift.

That’s why it sounds so soothing the fact there is no Valentine’s Day on Mars. Because, life there could be raw for us.

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❤ ❤ ❤ Love, Ellie ❤ ❤ ❤

Toilet Paper Doomsday

In a day like no other, as you prepare for a productive day (or pretend it’s going to be productive), you do what most people do after waking up; you empty your tank. It is a simple thing you could do in the middle of the night, when you are awaken by your bladder, with a gnawing discomfort that rushes down your legs. Sometimes, you take action and make an effort to alleviate the bladder-full sensation – mostly when you have nightmares and want to reset your sleep – but other times, you toughen up and go back to your dreams, even if it means hallucinating waterfalls.

It’s all fine, it really is, until you are awake and find yourself leaking droplets as you rush to the magic bowl. And then it hits you, you aren’t senile, and senile people are prepared and wear diapers. You are not toddler potty training either, so that is not an excuse. Who are you trying to find an excuse for, anyway? These thoughts are all running through your head.

Ding! Ding! You are about to panic. The toilet roll is almost finished and you barely had enough for the morning. You always plan ahead and you know you have more toilet rolls in the cabinet (after all, you always buy before you run out). This time, however, you seem to have misplaced the backup supplies – misplace is a word you use in your head when you are in denial of your own negligence – but, there is a store near your workplace and you can buy a few rolls. And you do, and you are happy with your rolls, like you have just received your first Nintendo console. Even your co-workers stare at your proud grinning, and stay away from you for the day. But, you don’t care, because you know that after work, your “cushions” will be all taken care of.

You come home, relax, have dinner, and get ready for sleep. You reach for the new toilet roll, but it isn’t there. You forgot to take it out of bag when you came home. You live home alone so you walk like a penguin with your pants down, rummaging through your things to find it. There is nothing, and you retrace your steps only to find out that you never came home with the bag.

When you are in a panic, nothing logical comes to mind. A shower would solve things, but what about in the morning? What would you use? Q-tips? Tissues? Paper towels? A towel? Napkins? A loofah? You could, and only you would know about it.

As you waddle back to the bathroom feeling defeated, you turn some lights off, fix a few tilted picture frames, and close your hallway closet. You come to a full stop and remember why the closet was left opened. You slide the doors and you find 24 rolls of toilet paper.

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What do you remember?

It sickens me watching people going crazy over buying gifts for the holidays. Why on earth do you give yourself unnecessary headaches? People, you don’t HAVE 10 people to shop, you WANT to shop for them. Do you HAVE to? No, you don’t. Is it good that you want to? Of course it is. What’s wrong is how everyone fights over a stupid gift receipt, or how much you WANT (keyword is WANT, because you don’t HAVE to) to spend, or getting grumpy over a particular toy your kids want, but you can’t find. Breaking News, your kids won’t care. I certainly wanted so many things when I was little, but I didn’t get them all. I’m alive now and happy, so no, it won’t affect your kids life, and best of all, it won’t ruin your life – you save $100 and you get to live, isn’t that wonderful?

Hey, I get it. I didn’t grow up having everything I ever wanted, and when/if I have kids, I will certainly want to buy them what they ask for, but that is not going to be the case every single time. What I remember is spending time with my family over the holidays, and wrapping my stuffed animals and giving them to them as gifts. What I remember is getting a duplicate set for my dolls and donating them to poor children. Their joyous expressions are cemented in my memory forever. Which is why this society – full of consumerism- has forgotten how to live.

I ask everyone around me who ever gets me gifts not to give me a gift receipt with it. I always tell them that I will love what they give me. Seriously, why wouldn’t I love their gifts? I know who they are and I’m surrounded by loveable people. Why would I expect to receive something I won’t like? T-shirt size? Well, if they know me well enough, they should know my size. If it doesn’t mean, then I’ll donate it, or I’ll use it for something else. We have to stop and teach others to be grateful for what we get. Technically, we shouldn’t give each other anything, but we do anyway, so why not do it with a smile and without ranting about money?

We remember emotions, we don’t remember what we got. Honestly, I barely remember every present I have ever gotten. All I remember is who was there and how I was treated. Hey, I made other kids happy when I was a kid, and that would not have been possible had my family not taught me what’s important. And yes, gift receipts are my pet peeves, which is a bit weird to some people, but whatever.

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❤ ❤ ❤ Love, Ellie ❤ ❤ ❤

Poem: Steps

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Walk into my shoes

and step forward for me

transform my soles into a will

and endure my sorrows.

Emerge from the distraught ground

and salvage what I lost

leave behind my blindness

and open wounds.

In sacred soil I dare not walk

without a hand to reinforce the wrong

where the only exit is on favourable weather

a rarity even in the best moments. 

Looking back into the past with your best friends

The essence of friendship, relies solely on the power to momentarily overlook the count of how many friends you have, and instead count their value they bring into your life. With that being said, I may speak based on my own experience, but at some point in your life, you and your best friends will look back and laugh at the corniness of your pasts.

1) That guy you were convinced your best friend was going to marry. Yes that guy who was a model citizen back when you encouraged her to confess her “love” to him, who is now a complete douchebag and only serves as a reminder that you can overcome mistakes.

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2) The day your instincts were right. 

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3) When you watched movies and you were both convinced they were based on your lives. 

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4) The first time you had too much to drink in front of your best friend, and you tried to act like you were fine.

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5) The popcorn button on the microwave didn’t do s**t, and it took 2 bags to figure it out.

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6) When one of you had to move away ,and you put on a brave face to stop the Apocalyptic feeling that ran through your veins.

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Not every friend who enters your life will stay, but a good friend will leave a good feeling in your life forever. The best you can do is build memories and carry on.

❤ ❤ ❤ Love, Ellie ❤ ❤ ❤